Green Flags for a Relationship—Expat Edition
relationships 09-12-2025
Here are some signs you’re dating someone real, grounded, and not trying to turn you into an ATM.
1. They NEVER Ask for Money Early (or At All)
A huge, shining green flag. Good partners:
- Don’t bring up money
- Don’t hint
- Don’t guilt-trip
- Feel uncomfortable taking anything from you
If you offer to help later on, they still hesitate. This is normal. This is healthy.
2. They Have a Real Job or Purpose
They don’t need to be rich — they just need direction. Green flags:
- Steady job
- Studying seriously
- Has goals
- Working to support themselves
- Not sleeping until noon every day
Their ambition is greater than income.
3. Their Life Is Consistent (No Dramatic Rollercoaster)
No weekly emergencies, no dying relatives every month, no bizarre drama arcs.
A stable life is a good sign:
- Healthy family relations
- Predictable schedule
- No chaotic stories
- No weird disappearances
Stable people = stable relationships.
4. They Communicate Clearly and Calmly
Real partners:
- Don’t blow up emotionally
- Don’t guilt-trip you
- Don’t manipulate
- Don’t vanish for days
They talk like adults — not like someone running 3 foreigner relationships at once.
5. They’re Proud to Be Seen With You (No Hiding)
They don’t avoid:
- Video calls
- Photos
- Being tagged
- Being introduced
A green-flag partner isn’t hiding you from someone else.
6. They Respect Your Boundaries
Massive green flag. They respect:
- Your time
- Your space
- Your “no”
- Your pace
- Your financial independence
Healthy people don’t rush or pressure you.
7. They’re Open About Their Life
They’re not secretive.
They tell you:
- Where they work
- Their family situation
- Their previous relationships
- Their goals
- What they’re worried about
Open, honest, grounded.
8. They Ask About YOU (Not Just What You Can Provide)
Green-flag partners are curious about:
- Your work
- Your hobbies
- Your friends
- Your family
- Your goals
They care about you, not your economic output.
9. They Offer to Pay (Even If You Decline)
This is a big one. Good Filipinas/Filipinos:
- Offer to split
- Try to pay for coffee
- Insist on covering small things
- Feel bad if you pay too much
It’s the intention that matters.
10. Their Family Isn’t Immediately Asking For Things
A good family:
- Doesn’t guilt-trip the foreigner
- Doesn’t ask for “help”
- Doesn’t treat you like a savior
A respectful family is a good thing.
11. They Take Things Slowly
Healthy people prefer:
- Slow emotional pacing
- Gradual commitment
- Meeting step-by-step
- Building trust naturally
Scammers rush. Good partners invest time.
12. They Keep Their Word
Small things:
- Time commitments
- Plans
- Meeting schedule
- Promises
Consistency is a better predictor of loyalty than “I love you.”
13. They Show Genuine Care Without Expecting Anything
Examples:
- Messages when you’re sick
- Checking if you got home safely
- Remembering small details
- Supporting your goals
- Being emotionally present
These don’t cost money. That’s why they’re real.
14. They Don’t Use You as a Ticket to a Better Life
They don’t:
- Push for visas
- Push to move abroad
- Push for financial milestones
They’re with you for you, not your geography.
15. You Feel Peace, Not Confusion
The biggest green flag:
- No anxiety
- No guessing
- No paranoia
- No gut feeling that something is off
If someone brings peace into your life, don’t ignore it.
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Photo by Brittani Burns on Unsplash